Bliss Counselling | Communication
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Communication

It’s no secret that money problems can be a huge source of relationship strife — in fact, most surveys report money as the main source of stress in a relationship, and it’s easy to see why. If the money isn’t there, it can seep into every part of your life and affect every part of your day. From grocery shopping, to a friend's birthday, to what you think about before you go to sleep, money is always there. It’s an...

You know those people, the ones that when you’re having a conversation with them, you find yourself taking a few steps back because they’re all up in your face? That’s a physical boundary that they just crossed. Boundaries are physical and emotional. Think of emotional boundaries like your invisible bubble of how close (or far) you prefer people to hang out in. Our boundaries help define who we are, determine what we’ll put up with, and keep us safe from undesirable...

Have you ever screwed up in your relationship, or have done something that you immediately felt terrible about? Perhaps your stomach started doing backflips and you were filled with a sense of dread, anxiety, and maybe even anger or shame. However you choose to describe the feeling, it probably didn’t feel awesome. Many folks might immediately label these feelings as, “bad.” We hear this a lot in our therapy work with clients, and our response is almost always the same: Feelings aren’t...

  The problem with saying, “Let’s agree to disagree,” is that we often shut down important conversations in an attempt to preserve our relationships. Unfortunately, when we take this approach we don’t allow our connections to deepen. Often, we use this phrase to avoid arguments or conflicts entirely, convincing ourselves that it is simply easier to end the conversation and keep our opinions to ourselves. In counselling sessions with couples, I am often challenging them to rethink their prior assumptions about...

Often when I have clients come in to discuss topics related to their couple relationships, family relationships or friendships, what I hear is:  “I can’t tell them because I may hurt their feelings.” Well, one thing we know as therapists is that this exact type of thinking is what frequently keeps people stuck in unhealthy relationships or prevents connection.  When we withhold what we are thinking to ‘protect’ someone, we don’t allow opportunity for connection or growth. We stagnate, we build...

For a lot of parents talking to their kids about sex and sexuality is the very definition of awkward. Fortunately, however, there is a way to approach the subject matter with a minimum amount of discomfiture. More importantly, there is significant value for kids when parents ensure these conversations are ongoing. Clear and consistent messages about their bodies, desires and functions set kids up to feel positive about their own bodies from the get-go, and, as they grow and mature,...

Most Marriage & Family Therapists (MFTs) and psychotherapists who deal with couples’ counselling often come aboard once there’s a problem within the relationship that requires addressing. Couples heading into commitments and marriages will more often seek premarital counselling from their chosen officiants or more familiar spiritual caregivers, but MFTS are increasingly privileged to have the chance to work with clients embarking on these kinds of commitment processes. It’s a great deal of fun, most of the time, to sit with...

After reading my Being Mindful Of Your Nice To Nag Ratio post, I heard from K.J. Dell’Antonia at The New York Times Well Family Blog. She wondered, “What do you do when you have to correct a child because it is necessary, as in the case of a special needs or speech issues?” This is a great question! It’s very easy to get into a negative pattern of correcting or nagging too much to the point where our children feel...

The inclusive acronym for sexual identity is continuously evolving. Here is a comprehensive* list of LGBTQIA+ Term Definitions: *This list is neither comprehensive nor inviolable, but it is a work in progress toward those goals. With identity terms, trust the person who is using the term and their definition of it above any dictionary. These definitions are the creation of a cultural commons. Advocate – (noun) (1) a person who actively works to end intolerance, educate others, and support social equity for...

We all have parenting moments we regret. The other day I was hard on my son and felt very badly about my behaviour. Even though we may have the tools to do so, calming down when our kids are melting down, sometimes for the most ridiculous reasons, can feel impossible to do. It is important to do relationship repair after rough parenting moments. This helps our relationship with our children deepen, stops trust-rifts from growing, and also shows them how to...