Bliss Counselling | Relationships
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Relationships

04 Apr

Why You’re Too Tired For Sex & How To Get Your Groove Back

If your pillows could talk. Not tonight. Ugh, I’m soooo tired. Just let me sleep. You’re just too tired for sex, and honestly, it’s the furthest thing from your mind and while feeling guilty is hard enough, you wish you had enough energy to have sex. Even just thinking about sex makes you tired. Ask yourself these questions: How’s your diet? Is it mainly made up of unprocessed, healthy, and whole foods? Are you hydrated? Are you drinking at least eight...

31 Mar

It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it….

Often when I have clients come in to discuss topics related to their couple relationships, family relationships or friendships, what I hear is:  “I can’t tell them because I may hurt their feelings.” Well, one thing we know as therapists is that this exact type of thinking is what frequently keeps people stuck in unhealthy relationships or prevents connection.  When we withhold what we are thinking to ‘protect’ someone, we don’t allow opportunity for connection or growth. We stagnate, we build...

26 Mar

14 Common Misconceptions About Divorce and How That Affects Your Relationship

Misconceptions About Divorce Hurt Relationships One doesn’t have to make it very far into their twenties to experience a friend going through a divorce. Thanks to multiple media sources, from daytime television to Facebook, even people who haven’t lived through divorce think they know what divorce is like. However, these presumptions may impact how you treat your friend during their time of need, and can cause very real hurt, frustration, even anger. Common Misconceptions About Divorce Divorcing people only feel anger and bitterness...

21 Mar

Talking To Your Kids About Sex and Sexuality

For a lot of parents talking to their kids about sex and sexuality is the very definition of awkward. Fortunately, however, there is a way to approach the subject matter with a minimum amount of discomfiture. More importantly, there is significant value for kids when parents ensure these conversations are ongoing. Clear and consistent messages about their bodies, desires and functions set kids up to feel positive about their own bodies from the get-go, and, as they grow and mature,...

02 Mar

Sex, Relationships, and Blended Families

Keeping the spark alive in your relationship, especially when parenting and blended family struggles kick in, can become challenging. Therefore, being on the same page as your partner despite these stressors is essential to maintaining a healthy relationship. Bliss Counselling's very own sexologist, Kelly McDonnell-Arnold, and Stepmom coach, Jamie Scrimgeour, discuss tips and tricks on preventing these stressors from entering the bedroom! Check out the video below!        ...

12 Feb

The Four R’s of Correcting A Child

After reading my Being Mindful Of Your Nice To Nag Ratio post, I heard from K.J. Dell’Antonia at The New York Times Well Family Blog. She wondered, “What do you do when you have to correct a child because it is necessary, as in the case of a special needs or speech issues?” This is a great question! It’s very easy to get into a negative pattern of correcting or nagging too much to the point where our children feel...

30 Jan

How to Do Parent-Child Relationship Repair

We all have parenting moments we regret. The other day I was hard on my son and felt very badly about my behaviour. Even though we may have the tools to do so, calming down when our kids are melting down, sometimes for the most ridiculous reasons, can feel impossible to do. It is important to do relationship repair after rough parenting moments. This helps our relationship with our children deepen, stops trust-rifts from growing, and also shows them how to...

28 Sep

Trust: Creating a Flexible, Non-binary Model

When I was in high school, I was a Theatre Arts Nerd. We had a Drama teacher in my first year who gave us a trust exercise: we paired up with one partner facing away from the other, and then we leaned back with our eyes closed until we toppled, to be caught by our partner. Reverse and repeat a few times, until the teacher said, “Great! Now that you all trust each other, we can begin!” I distinctly remember...

29 Jun

Consent in Relationships: The Unacknowledged Country

  One good thing about being a therapist with one foot in traditional monogamous culture, and one in the poly community (and one in the BDSM community+) is that I have an opportunity to bring some interesting perspectives from one culture to another. Often these are concepts that we’d think *SHOULD* be obvious across the entire relationship spectrum, but you’d be amazed at how often this isn’t the case at all. One of the biggest places where I am persistently surprised...

14 Feb

How To Keep Things Spicy When You’re A Bit Vanilla

  With all of the hype surrounding the release of 50 Shades Darker, I’m betting that there are many couples wondering if it is time to break out the floggers and paddles and ditch the stale sex routine. Floggers and paddles can be great if that’s your thing, but some people just aren’t that adventurous. And the great news is that you don’t have to be! There are many other ways to heat things up with your partner this Valentines Day. Here...